Paraiso del Diablo

Diablo Lake, North Cascades, Washington. I brought my demons to paradise. At the time, months of constant sciatic pain were a cloud around me, physically and mentally. If there was devil, he had gotten into my leg and made every day an agony. Part of me just wanted to lie in a fetal position where nothing hurt. I tried to exert the nerve into remission, but the more I pushed it, the worse it got. But I am a stubborn man. I felt I could cure myself if I could just make my body stronger, stretch it out, exorcise the pain. Despite everyone's criticisms that I was aggravating things more, I ultimately refused to give up a planned trip, and came to this slice of heaven, to climb mountains. Every day I hurt at the start and end, but not so much as I pushed myself through the hikes. Since I began coming out here, the North Cascades had always seemed mystical to me. Darkly forested and impossibly steep, the trails are often lost under snow pack late into August, and yet they are a pure pleasure to hike, and a feast for the eyes. This day's slog was over, and, camp made, I went looking for a sunset. I found it above the water-can't-really-be-that-color-i-don't-believe-it of Diablo Lake. But it's real. Maybe the devil in me decided to go play in paradise while I was so distracted. Maybe it was more a departure than a cure. Within a couple of weeks of returning home, my nerve pain was gone, the cloud had lifted like the one I saw on this night, revealing the shine of hope. I left some pain in these mountains. But, there is always more to be found. I remain stubborn. Maybe I can find another devil's paradise.

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Diablo Lake, North Cascades, Washington. I brought my demons to paradise. At the time, months of constant sciatic pain were a cloud around me, physically and mentally. If there was devil, he had gotten into my leg and made every day an agony. Part of me just wanted to lie in a fetal position where nothing hurt. I tried to exert the nerve into remission, but the more I pushed it, the worse it got. But I am a stubborn man. I felt I could cure myself if I could just make my body stronger, stretch it out, exorcise the pain. Despite everyone's criticisms that I was aggravating things more, I ultimately refused to give up a planned trip, and came to this slice of heaven, to climb mountains. Every day I hurt at the start and end, but not so much as I pushed myself through the hikes. Since I began coming out here, the North Cascades had always seemed mystical to me. Darkly forested and impossibly steep, the trails are often lost under snow pack late into August, and yet they are a pure pleasure to hike, and a feast for the eyes. This day's slog was over, and, camp made, I went looking for a sunset. I found it above the water-can't-really-be-that-color-i-don't-believe-it of Diablo Lake. But it's real. Maybe the devil in me decided to go play in paradise while I was so distracted. Maybe it was more a departure than a cure. Within a couple of weeks of returning home, my nerve pain was gone, the cloud had lifted like the one I saw on this night, revealing the shine of hope. I left some pain in these mountains. But, there is always more to be found. I remain stubborn. Maybe I can find another devil's paradise.